Happy Friday!

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We’ve been thinking about and planning our vegetable garden lately, but it seems that at this time of year we are at the mercy of the weather. We’ve been receiving strong storms and tons of rain over the past few days, so I’m afraid our plans of finally getting plants in might be delayed for one more week, as the ground is mushy like a swamp in our back yard.

Also, the boys are off school today so I’m planning a little adventure with them this morning. I’m really excited to spend more outdoor time with them once they’re out for the summer next month! Here are a few links from around the web:

The cherry blossoms should be in peak bloom this weekend if you’re anywhere near DC!

And on the topic of flowers, I keep coming back to these photographs by Jessica Tremp — so inspiring for spring.

I am obsessed with Katie Scott’s illustrations and am considering buying a print for the boys’ bedroom but can hardly bring myself to choose a favorite!

Also, even though it’s a year old, I still think this video is hilarious. Two-year-olds are crazy!

If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go? For me, it would be Iceland. I will go there someday!

Have a great weekend.

Reading…

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The Girl on the Train, by Paula Hawkins

Surprise, surprise! When I’m not reading pop science, I’m reading psychological thrillers. This one I kept hearing about through other blogs and recommendations from afar, so I picked it up over the weekend and now I can’t put it down. It’s very similar to Gone Girl in the narration from 3 different characters and 3 very different points of view that seem unreliable and thus, intriguing. It’s a tense thriller with many twists and turns and plenty of dysfunction. I’m thoroughly enjoying it.

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Home, by Carson Ellis

And while I was perusing the bookstore, this book caught my eye in the children’s section and I ended up taking it home for the boys. Ellis is an exceptional illustrator who did all the art for the Wildwood series (which I intend to pick up next for out-loud bedtime reading for our older two) — I started to read it and it was a captivating adventure! But back to Home. It’s a simple but beautiful look into what a home can be: mythical, nursery rhyme, under the sea or in a stump.
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“Sea homes. Bee homes. / Hollow tree homes.”

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 “A raccoon lives here. / An artist lives here.”

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“This is the home of a Slovakian duchess. / This is the home of a Kenyan blacksmith.”

An imaginative, lovely book that somehow reminds me of a Wes Anderson movie in its visual appeal and imaginative direction. This one inspires the creative mind and opens up the realm of possibilities when it comes to the question, “What makes a home?”

Dress That Mama

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Wearing a dress that has withstood the many purges of clothing I’ve gone through over the past two years. Paired with a head scarf (℅ Everything Golden), Converse slide-ons, and bright red lipstick, I felt upbeat and springy last Saturday when I wore this out and about. We walked to the Loop for dinner and enjoyed live outdoor music even though it was a bit chilly in the shade (luckily I had a sweater and a very warm Oliver on my lap to keep me toasty!). DSC_0060DSC_0062It’s really starting to warm up around here, so maybe those twig legs will finally get some color! Have a lovely Wednesday!

We’re No Boy Scouts

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Over our boys’ spring break, they re-watched the movie Up, an animated Disney movie that follows a “wilderness explorer” and a feisty 78-year-old balloon salesman on an adventure to South America. The movie is heartfelt and I particularly appreciated the close connection that forms between the boy and his elderly friend as well as the use of an older character as a brave and witty hero. The boys loved the movie too, but for a different reason: the wilderness badges.

As soon as the movie was over, Milo and Oliver started discussing which “badges” they would have earned; Milo was sure he would have the climbing badge while Oliver stated matter-of-factly that he would have the art badge and probably the navigation badge since he has been studying geography so intensely in school. Then, Milo turned to me and asked, “Mama, why can’t we join the boy scouts?”

It was a question Andrew and I had avoided answering truthfully for awhile. It was easy to dismiss the issue a year ago, when we were saying no to just about all extra curricular activities and had discussed with our boys how we thought they just needed down time after school for now. But recently we let some activities sneak in at the boys’ urging; the older two do circus class every Saturday and just joined their after-school running club this spring. It would have been easy to say, “You guys are signed up for enough extras for now,” and let the issue drop. But there has been a lot of open discussion between Andrew and me within earshot of the boys about some pretty serious topics, so I felt that it was time I had that open discussion (albeit more their speed) with them directly.

I usually prefer to keep this online space a lighthearted one, leaving out news and politics and religion even though they are talked about almost daily in our home. But I wanted to share this particular topic because it is on the forefront of our minds lately and has been an issue that is very near and dear to us.

We are strong advocates of gay rights and the Boy Scouts of America are not.

While the Boy Scouts have made some progress on the issue (they now “allow” openly gay scouts to participate and recently hired an openly gay Eagle Scout as a camp counselor), they still prohibit openly gay adult leaders. Even after individual scout groups such as one in Maryland adopted non-discrimination policies declaring that the group would not discriminate “against any individual or family based on race, religion, national origin, or sexual orientation,” they received threats from the NCAC leaders of the Boy Scouts of America that they would not be recognized as an organization unless they “erased the reference to sexual orientation in their non-discrimination statement.” To me, it’s pretty clear where they stand on this issue. And that’s not a position we are willing to support or ignore.

Because we have been raising our children to accept others, treat others with kindness and respect, and to embrace differences, the conversation I had with Milo and Oliver was a natural one. We talked about what being gay means, and how it is just another amazing example of the beauty of human diversity. I answered all of their questions with honesty and gave examples of the friends and family we love and respect. And then I had to tell them that not everyone accepts people for who they are, and that sometimes they take it so far that they make rules to exclude them.

By this point, Milo had started tearing up. He was angry and sad, but I couldn’t tell if it was because he was disappointed that we weren’t going to let him be a boy scout, or if he was troubled by the unfairness of exclusion. “But Mom, that’s bullying!” he said. And then I started crying too. “Yes, buddy, it is.”

We will not let our three wonderful, dynamic, super smart boys be boy scouts until the Boy Scouts of America changes their policy not only on gay members and leaders, but also religious freedom (or more accurately, the freedom to choose no religion at all). Because it turns out, upon further investigation, this organization also prohibits atheist members and leaders. So, unless you are religious and straight, you’re not welcome.

I talked with Milo and Oliver for about half an hour about all of this, which is a long time to talk about a serious issue with a 5 and 7-year-old. They both seemed really angry and sad, but we talked about how important it is not to ignore the exclusion of others just because you really want to do something, and how that would make you a bully too. We talked about doing what you feel is right, doing what you believe in, and trying to make a change. Milo asked how we could change their minds. I told them that sometimes you can’t, but that it’s really important to try, and one place to start is by writing a letter or having a discussion.

We’re giving the issue space with our boys, but also contemplating helping our older boys formulate a letter expressing their feelings on the exclusion promoted by the Boy Scouts of America. If they are ready, they will write and send it. If not, we will revisit the topic later.

After our discussion, Milo and Oliver had an intense brainstorming session, and decided that the best way to deal with this issue was to form their own scout group, where anyone could join, and where they would design and earn paper badges, and that’s exactly what they’ve done. Oliver earned a “laundry badge” for doing an entire load of laundry from start to finish, from sorting to pouring detergent to finding the right cycle, to transferring the wet clothes to the dryer, then removing and folding the dried clothing… and then (kind of) putting them away. He was so proud of his paper circle with a washing machine on it!

I am disheartened by the “one step forward, two steps back” movement of gay rights at the moment. That what appears to me to be completely obvious civil rights issues do not appear that way to others, and that I have to have a discussion with my little boys about why some adults are pretty closed-minded when it comes to people who are different from themselves. But you’d better believe I’m not going to shield them from the injustices of the world to have them grow up completely oblivious to what others might be going through. We are teaching them to stand up for what they believe in, for what’s right.

So for now, we’re no boy scouts.

(Easter) Weekend Shenanigans

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Flowers, flowers, everywhere! It was a weekend full of enjoying spring and our lovely friends. We held fast to tradition and headed to Ingrid and Brent’s neighborhood where we partook in the Easter day parade and egg hunt before heading back to their house for an afternoon of games and shenanigans. It was, as expected, a blast. Two out of three of the boys ended up leaving in tears (Emil fell and scraped his leg up on the way out after peeing his pants and Oliver punched Milo in the nose after a scuffle), which is a good sign that we’ve probably overstayed our welcome. Good times for the Knights.
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Emil was much more bashful around the Easter bunny this time around and almost missed him completely before Milo took him by the hand and ran with him at the last minute, encouraging Emil to get a quick hug. Such a sweet big brother he has! The weather was warm and sunny and the boys cleaned up on candy, which they devoured (and which probably contributed to all the crying). DSC_0084DSC_0071DSC_0109DSC_0110DSC_0117DSC_0123

We were also so pleased to meet and enjoy some new friends, who have four lovely children with whom the boys played so nicely. It’s always wonderful to find good people just around the corner and we hope to see them again soon. DSC_0146DSC_0164DSC_0198DSC_0213DSC_0203DSC_0241DSC_0244DSC_0026

Thanks, Ingrid and Brent, for putting up with our crazy antics for one more year. We love you guys!